The Benefits of “Encountering Other”

Early this week I received a call from an ex-colleague, seeking my assistance. She had been having a discussion with a young professional in her company whom she thought could benefit from some kind of a mentoring relationship with me. I gladly agreed.  And the young professional has since contacted me, based on my ex-colleague’s recommendation. And she has come to me with the confidence that our conversations and dialogue will help guide her towards realising her dreams. And what inspiring dreams she does have.

This has got me thinking about the meaning of ‘encountering other’ in the context of the journey that I must travel with this young professional. In specific terms, what does this mean for me, in terms of the responsibility that has been entrusted to me, and also for her, in terms of the faith she has placed in my ex-colleague’s recommendation. And also what is required of each one of us in the process to ensure that the objectives she has of this exercise will be a success.

It is easy to see the process of encountering other as simply being about meeting another person. But then if we reflect on the relational issues, we must ask as to how much does this require of us to know ourselves? In the specific context of this encounter, does this not require of me to know how I would add value to another person’s life, what specific abilities did my ex-colleague think would impact positively on this young professional, and how do I project these in a way that will benefit her? How do I read whether I am starting to make the positive impact that this young professional is expecting?

In order to answer these questions, it requires of me to know myself better than I think I do. Otherwise, I will have a very limited ability to know how I could make the right impact, and ensure that the hopes that are placed by this young professional on my guidance are realised. And the better I know who I am, the more I am able to project and reflect this to many that I will encounter. In simple terms, I have better grasp of my personality and value.

So, although I was called for the purpose of assisting another person, the process by its nature benefits me in ways that I could not have predicted.

This to me confirms my view that the benefits of encountering and mentoring far exceed the costs in terms of time that one must invest. Not just for those being mentored or assisted, but also for those who may be seen to be doing the mentoring and assistance.

Encounter other.